Part 1 - Salvation dialogue

If it needed a passport, she said
last bite of fettucine primavera
open sesame, password
special dispensation
to get in, I would not want it
would spurn salvation
(the salad needs balsamic,
the bread is stale)

I have the knowledge, said the other
teacher of bible studies, tuesdays
for recalcitrant adults, sundays children
four and up, pre-registration required
unless you say the words, deeds, good or
otherwise, will not suffice, not get you in,
identification at the door
(my coffee's cold,
the lettuce wilted)

mint jello, house tiramisu?
the bureaucrat at heaven's door
please take a number and a seat
you're very important
to us, welcome to the gates of heaven
we'll validate your parking ticket
no storming countenanced


Part 2 - Your call is very ... to us, please stay on the line

you take a number, here's a bench
the latest magazines to read,
for the salvation of your wicked soul
'Can You Avoid Reincarnation,'
'Why Churches Fail,' 'Modesty and the Single Girl,'
'Twelve Rings to Hell and More Each Day'

you need five forms of identification
four people that can vouch for you, no relatives
one each from Column A and Column B
the entrance fee prepaid, no checks allowed
all earthly joy desire passion striving
for the final prize
long gone, the kingdom overbooked
we sold out early, call again

Appreciate your patronage!
Door closed.